I have said it before and I’ll say it again, a lot of opera is bonkers. Pass The Spoon is an exception, in that it is not sensible enough to be bonkers. I can’t remember having seen any performance as childishly unfunny as this in my life, in fact I have been to two Christmas shows for 3-year-olds plus during the past week and they were the height of sophistication when compared with this. As an example, the main male character, Phillip Fork, spent what seemed like an hour, but was only about two or three minutes, saying the word ‘pea’ over and over again, in different silly voices, accompanied by the orchestra playing seemingly random notes. What really amazed me, though, was that quite a few of the audience members were in hysterics.
The gist of what little plot there was, is that the audience, rather than being in the wonderful Howard Assembly Room, were in a tv studio for a special edition of the cookery show, Pass The Spoon, in which June Spoon and Phillip Fork were to prepare a meal for their celebrity guest Mr Granules who, rumour has it, enjoys eating babies.
The pair have nothing prepared so wing it by coming up with a menu of vegetable soup for starter, hence the pea episode – which was followed by riffs on the words, carrot and potato, a main course of chops and a dessert of banana custard, much to the chagrin of Banana who had suggested he act waiter for the event.
June Spoon, Amy J Payne, and Phillip Fork, Xavier Hetherington, interview a potato, Ben Yorke-Griffiths to see if it is up to being put into a soup.
The vegetables were interviewed for the job of being in the soup and there was a visit to the Butcher, who traded from a kind of church pulpit, for the chops. Disaster struck when the meat was burned and they had to go back to the altar for a replacement pie as he had sold out of chops. It didn’t really matter as Mr Granules, after dismissing the soup by swiping it off the table (and shooting dead a manic depressive, alcoholic egg), did the same to the pie and proceeded to eat June Spoon instead. The banana was spared and he enlisted the help of the Butcher to cut Mr Granules open to release Ms Spoon before she was digested. The plan worked, so all ended well; except for the egg and Mr Granules of course.
The Butcher, Peter Van Hulle, in his pulpit.
Had the above been handled differently it could possibly have appealed to my sense of humour, but the absurdist way in which it was presented left me stone cold. I had been for my pre-show pint at The Templar but even that didn’t help, in fact I thought I should have tried to find the local LSD dealer instead, but I doubt even hallucinatory substances would have made a dancing turd humorous. The nearest thing I got to even thinking about cracking a smile was when Banana, in a fit of frustration, said what I was thinking, “F**k this! I’ve had enough, I’m off.” Obviously we both persevered.
Most of the dialogue was surreal. When in the church of the Butcher, Phillip Fork asked him what kind of meat the chops were, he hesitated and said there were only two kinds of meat; homosexual and the rest. I am going to curtail my résumé of the piece there except to reveal that June Spoon was rescued safely from the gut of Mr Granule.
Frazer Scott, Mr Egg; Mark Nathan, Banana; Amy J Payne, June Spoon and Xavier Hetherington, Phillip Fork.
As you would expect, the singing was superb, even though there were very few opportunities for the artists involved to showcase their talents, most of the music being staccato bursts. The 11-piece Band, comprising members of the Orchestra of Opera North, including their Leader, Katie Stillman and Conductor Garry Walker, who is also Opera North’s Music Director, did a great job – I think – as the notes they played were mostly to accentuate the ‘comedy’ rather than provide a flowing narrative. They were all suitably attired in chef’s uniform, thankfully the broth wasn’t further spoiled by too many cooks.
Frazer Scott, Shit singing.
The cast, as detailed in the programme, was Amy J Payne as June Spoon, Xavier Hetherington, Phillip Fork, Mark Nathan played Banana, Frazer Scott was Mr Egg, Shit and Dung Beetle, Peter Van Hulle was Butcher and Ben Yorke-Griffiths, Mr Granules and Vegetables. The Music was by David Fennessey and the Libretto, David Shrigley and Nicholas Bone.
Ben Yorke-Griffiths as Mr Granules and Amy J Payne as June Spoon. Don’t worry, he’s only eating her.
Should absurdity and stupidity be your thing and, as I said, it seems to be some people’s, Pass The Spoon is playing at Howard Assembly Room until 21st December. For more information and to book, please go to https://www.operanorth.co.uk/whats-on/pass-the-spoon/ The age guidance and content warning reads “12+, contains strong language and adult humour.” I must have missed that bit.
Apart from the end, the thing I really loved about this ‘Sort of Opera’ was that Christmas can only get better.
Photographs by Tom Arber
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